Think back to your first memories of Christmas with your family. The older we are the farther back that is. I can remember coming downstairs on Christmas morning and seeing a stack of presents under the piano. We never had a Christmas tree growing up. I'm not sure if it was because we couldn't afford it or because it was just an unnecessary expense, either way it was normal not to have a tree. My parents were very ‘no frills’ people.
Christmas morning was coming downstairs to a pile of gifts by the piano. My dad would hand out the gifts one by one and we would unwrap them. Thinking back now, we didn’t have very much money compared to what we give our kids today. Even though we got meager gifts at Christmas and were never taught that santa was real, it was still a magical time for us and I believe that every child deserves a magical Christmas. Dad’s need to forget themselves and dedicate this time to making sure their children have that magical Christmas they deserve. You need to think about it from their eyes and understanding. You, dads and moms, have the power to make or break them on Christmas (and everyday) this year, you can be in a self important mood or a self satisfying mood and snap back at them or yell at them and with one word, ruin their day. It should be, more than others, a forgiving day for your children. The younger they are the more of a magical time it can be. We want our kids to grow up with fond memories of Christmas, thinking “I remember when my dad took all morning to help build the playhouse we got for Christmas” or “remember when Mom cooked breakfast and we had cookies and milk after breakfast that one Christmas” or "I remember when you got the big wheel you wanted and you wanted to ride it outside even though it snowed so dad shoveled the walk so you could ride" "remember how mom used to serve Christmas cookies and nutbread for Christmas breakfast" "We got to play with our toys all day with no chores on that day, every year" Those memories stand out in a child’s mind. As we get older we start to think that somehow we got cheated because we grow up to learn that all the magic is not here anymore, it becomes overwhelmed by the hustle and bustle of Christmas shopping and buying way too much stuff that we don't really 'need'. We could feel a sense of disappointment because what Christmas used to mean is not there anymore. But think again!! If we are one of the truly blessed to have children of our own, we can actually 'create' that magical time now and enjoy it through our children! And don't make the mistake of thinking that the window is so small that it only includes Christmas morning! It can extend as far back as searching for the perfect tree a family affair complete with photos and videos, picking out that tree and hauling it home. You could really make it a more intimate affair by driving to a farm and cutting down your own tree. setting it up, decorating it, plugging in the lights wrapping presents.... all things that could add to the greatness of the season. your tree may look funny with the uncoordinated decorations that your kids put up, to the funky wrap jobs on presents, even the chocolate chip cookies that taste a little funny cause there is too much flour...... that your 4 year old daughter made and you tell her you've never tasted better, ever, not even Mom's cookies!! Encouraging them to build Christmas presents or make presents can add to the season, woodworking, crafts or anything really. The key to making every Christmas season one to never forget for them, is to think of them first! If we treat the season as a chore, it will be just something to "get through". It will be something very un-enjoyable and a burden. If money is tight you spend more on the kids and exchange cards with words more meaningful than any gift, and mean those words to a spouse that may miss hearing those words. Maybe you've been married for 5, 10 or 20 years and think he/she knows how I feel anyway, when you say them or write them, it's a whole new game now. Even with your children, those words, mom and dad, mean the world to some. I've heard it said by kids from 10 to 30 that I can't remember my mom/dad ever saying "I love you" or "Good job, it looks great", those things make me cry inside when I hear them. Can some of our parents be that blind that they don't realize we need to hear those words and other words of encouragement?? Kids need to be hugged, held and told they are special......... EVERYDAY. If your parents didn't give you that great privilege, don't pass it on, let it stop here. Don't use them as an excuse, make the change in your generation! It's not too late, whether you are a 20 year old dad or a 75 year old mom, an "I love you" can stop feelings in their tracks, feelings of annoyance, of hate, of distrust, of anger.......... It's sort of like a big eraser, when those words are repeated sincerely, they wipe alot away! When it comes to your children and Christmas, remember, they come first. Forget the plans you made and how it has to be perfect and on time.... You could benefit from thinking 15 years down the road and thinking of what they will say about you. Will they say "Christmas was the best at our house, we always got to decorate the tree and wrap presents, we got to make cookies every year and I know dad didn't really like the snowball cookie that one year but he ate them anyway. Oh and the tree when I was 10!!! I saw it in pictures, it looks bad. HOw could they let us decorate it like that!? Man those were good times! Remember you broke the game we got like right away and dad just told us he would buy another one the next day, he didn't even yell at you! Remember you dropped the tray of cookies and mom and dad laughed instead of yelling at you?? "" Those are things that some kids can only dream of because their parents are so used to yelling at them for even the littlest mistake, sometime yelling because they are so used to the child messing up and figure they'll do it again. Parents, get your priorities straight! Those kids, no matter how old, come first, all the time every time. If it can be repaired or replaced it's not important. I like say "If something happens to something of mine, don't panic thinking i'll yell or be upset, as long as no one got hurt, we can replace or repair it".
Remember your children, I like to think of it as their holiday. We see it as the birth of Christ, they see it as presents. If you have a short temper and find yourself always reprimanding them. Give them one more gift this year, the gift of your understanding and patience
Merry Christmas
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