INSTA-gratification-GRAM

If we got to the bottom, really got honest answers from people of why they share what they do, it would probably not only surprise the hearer but also the speaker as well. Think about it. You go to work and share stories about your life with co-workers, you see people at social gatherings and share. What are you sharing? Do you have young kids and you share their successes and awesomeness with people, did you have an accomplishment that you are sharing with people. Most times it is bringing recognition to oneself. Take social media for example, scroll through your instagram feed and you will see post after post after hundreds of posts of people putting up photos that somehow compete with someone else. People post their holiday photos of where they went and who they are with, how much fun it is. They let the world know how big their Christmas tree is and photos of the kids cutting it down. Because if we take the time to go to a tree farm and cut it down we must tell the world that we did it so the world knows we have a tradition and it possibly makes the ones who just ran down the corner without the kids feel sub-par. We post everything. Our kids hair cuts. Who cares? Our kids first day of school. Who cares? Why do people feel the overwhelming need to tell the world their every step in life? Doesn't anyone have private moments anymore?? Christmas morning the feed is packed with videos and photos of kids opening their gifts. STOP people. Watch your children and treasure that in your heart. If your kids look great when you are going out, sure, take a photo. But if you decide to post on IG, what is the driving force behind that? To get compliments about your kids and validate the parent or give that parent the satisfaction that people think your kids are good looking. It is fishing for compliments. Posting photos of one self on IG, c'mon people, if that is not vanity and pride what is it? Posting a photo of yourself on IG and waiting for the compliments and likes. You would be lying if you said it would not make much difference to you if you received 5 likes or 100 likes or 1 comment or 100 comments. That difference would sadden you or puff you up. That is a fact. If your husband sends you flowers........ let it be a private intimate thing!! Once you share that with the world via social media you have diluted the specialness of it and now it is just a tool to fish for compliments for you and him. How great he is how thoughtful how awesome he is etc. Let your private moments be private moments, don't ruin them by sharing on social media. Happy birthday wishes.... really? You live with this person, why would you post a happy birthday wish on IG when you woke up next to them this morning? What is the reason behind it? Soliciting for kind words for them and birthday wishes. If a person does not know its my birthday i'm fine with that. You shouldn't need someone to tell the world it's your birthday so they can then wish you a good birthday. If your kids are reading the Bible or praying or bike riding, crafting, watching a movie, playing, etc. and it is a special moment, sure we all think to take a photo, we all carry cameras. But when it goes from taking a photo to treasure the moment and look back later in life, or hurrying to post it to the world.. what's the motivation? competition. We compete to see who can post the best photos of our kids, who can post the best sunsets, etc. We post things daily because we get a high from all the comments and likes. If we didn't get comments or likes would we still do it? Sure we say yes now, if we said no, it would be vain. Sure we read this and get a little bit angry and say it doesn't relate to me. But it does. How many of us check out certain posts to see how man likes or comments it got? If we say we never did that we lie. It's human nature seek approval and validation even if it is subconscious and today we can do that with no social interaction and little or no effort. If you go on vacation, go, enjoy it, stop the live feed of everything you do. Is it to let the world know you are having a good time, make those less fortunate feel more bad, convince yourself you are having fun, let the world know what you provided for your family or just feeding an addiction? Sure, take photos of your vacation, it would be foolish not to, everyone likes to reminisce later, but let it be a personal thing, a family thing. Ok, so your parents are gone, passed on, no longer with us. I get that. Mine are too. Any mention of that on social media can only be a cry for attention, a plea for comfort and wanting another wave of "I'm sorry" from everyone. If it is your mom or dad's birthday or the day they died... treasure it and remember them, but a mention on social media is a cry for attention. And, btw, they probably don't have Instagram in heaven, so posting a photo of a loved one who has passed and writing a letter to them probably won't be read or commented on by that person. So what is the reason behind that kind of post? To tell or convince people that we had the best relationship with that person or how much we loved them how much we miss them. Even doing those things in person seems cheesy and cheap like we are soliciting hugs or condolences........ We compete and deny it. compete by posting the nice things our spouse does for us. Compete by posting the things are kids do well. Compete by posting our kids performances and accomplishments. Compete by posting sayings and verses. Compete by posting in general. Stop competing. Stop searching for validation. Stop seeking approval. Stop.

Longwood Gardens this weekend

A few shots from our trip to Longwood gardens.

Birding from this weekend at Pennypack Park

Red-Bellied Woodpecker gathering food

Red-Bellied Woodpecker showing off food

Red-Bellied Woodpecker sharing food

Tufted Titmouse, House Finch, Red-Bellied Woodpecker, cowbird

House Wrens catching bugs for the babies

House Wren

House Wren

House Wren

bad capture of an Indigo Bunting

House Finch Twins

Female Cardinal

Immature Cardinal

Red Winged Blackbird

Here are several photos of Red Winged Blackbirds captured in the Poconos last week. There is a male, a female and an immature female.

1. Immature Female Redwinged Blackbird

2.  Immature Female Redwinged Blackbird

3.  Immature Female Redwinged Blackbird

 

 

4.  Immature Female Redwinged Blackbird

5.  Immature Female Redwinged Blackbird

6.  Immature Female Redwinged Blackbird

7.  Female Redwinged Blackbird

8.  Male Redwinged Blackbird

Don't forget your daughters

As dads we can tend to think of our boys alot more than our daughters when it comes to working around the house. Things such as gardening or simple home repairs or even building toys or a swing set. Our daughters can take a back seat and we can think they should be playing with dolls or reading. Those times can be meaningful to her and you. She can learn many life skills while helping you do your tasks around the house. Take the time to explain what each tool is and what it is used for. Then let her try it, mess up and try again. You will be teaching her valuable skills. Talking about why you are doing things the way you are, how you came to the conclusion you did and so on and so forth. Pretty soon you will hear your words come back at you, things such as her figuring a problem out. We as parents are always ready to help our children, but something far greater than just answering every question our kids have, is to stop and ask them a few questions so they can answer their own question. That kind of parenting will create a thinker and one who can figure things out. So when it comes to our daughters and our sons, don't count them out because they are a girl or too young or for any other reason. If they desire to be with you,... be with them. It is time well spent, no matter how long the job takes.

Because He Lives

With so many things in our lives that can weigh us down, cause us to fear or dread or think we cannot bear to think what tomorrow will be live, "I can face tomorrow because He lives". I'm sure all of us have experienced fear. Fear from unseen things can be terrifying and become debilitating. Fear is real and powerful and from the devil. All fear is gone, because He lives. Because He lives is a powerful song. If we take the time to think about the words we are singing and reflect on the things that Jesus has brought us through. The fear we once had, the pain we may have endured, the faith we needed, the addictions we desperately needed freedom from, the forgiveness we needed, the healing needed, devastation we once faced or loss we endured all are possible and now real, simply because He lives. He died for our freedom and forgiveness and rose again to be with us and carry us on.

The most powerful line in that song is "Because He lives, all fear is gone".  The devil is powerful and pain is real. But Jesus is more powerful and promises freedom. And Because He lives all fear is gone!

Because He lives
I can face tomorrow
Because He lives
All fear is gone
Because I know
He holds the future
And life is worth the living
Just because He lives

Baltimore Oriole

How to tell a dream

For the longest time I thought I didn't like hearing people's dreams retold. Although from time to time i'd have a dream that warranted being retold. Then recently, just after I finished telling a dream, my wife needed to tell me a dream she had. After a few minutes of setting the scene for her dream, she went into something that sounded like this, "you seemed like you but you looked like him and she had hair like a cat but barked like a dog and you were him but you at the same time but then you seemed like you were him and it was our kitchen but had my moms cabinets but it wasn't really my mom, but it sounded like my mom but looked like your dad but with your sisters hair but we were all at your grandmom's funeral but there was a trapeze above the service, it had a roof but we could still feel the rain ...........................................That's when I realized, I don't mind hearing dreams! What annoys the junk out of me is when someone is telling me a dream and they say all the stuff out loud that they should have figured out in their head first. Now I get it, sometime explaining the oddity of a dream is part of it, but  what's not part of it is the thinking out loud of how bizarre all the confusion of your dream is. So sort it out in your mind first then tell the dream. Tell the non confusing high lights, don't have a conversation with yourself outloud while you are telling the dream. That could cause concern with mental health professionals. Then maybe I will listen. Actually, I still probably don't care to hear yours, only my wife and kid's dreams.

PDA Today?

Does anyone else ever shake their head when they see a "public display of affection" PDA on the street corner? It seems that now with social media it has spread online too. It's Valentine's Day, and everyone wants to send out a special Valentine's greeting to their special person. It's not enough that we have face to face, email, text, phone call, video chat etc. etc. people have to use social media like Instagram or Facebook to put a public announcement of a personal wish to their friend or spouse. If you are married, you just spent the night with them, if you are not, call them. To me it seems impersonal and sort of like exploiting something. Do you really need to show all your friends and associates that you give your other a big birthday wish, valentine's greeting or I love you note? Are you that insecure about your relationship? It sounds like a cry for attention. Or are you just showing off what your man got your or your woman did for you? "He got you 5 dozen roses? psh, my man got me 6 dozen with assorted colors and a stuffed bear"..... the photos seem to say.  When you tell someone over and over how much in love with them you are.....on social media, you sound like you are trying to convince yourself you love them. Keep it private and personal. We wouldn't go into a crowded room and say those things to them on a loud speaker would we? So why put them on social media? Strange.......