If tomorrow never comes...

Sometimes late at night

I lie awake and watch her sleeping

She's lost in peaceful dreams

So I turn out the lights and lay there in the dark

And the thought crosses my mind

If I never wake up in the morning

Would she ever doubt

The way I feel about her in my heart

If tomorrow never comes

Will she know how much I loved her

Did I try in every way to show her every day

That she's my only one

And if my time on earth were through

And she must face this world without me

Is the love I gave her in the past

Gonna be enough to last

If tomorrow never comes

'Cause I've lost loved ones in my life

Who never knew how much I loved them

Now I live with the regret

That my true feelings for them never were revealed

So I made a promise to myself

To say each day how much she means to me

And avoid that circumstance

Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel

'Cause if tomorrow never comes

Will she know how much I loved her

Did I try in every way to show her every day

That she's my only one

And if my time on earth were through

And she must face this world without me

Is the love I gave her in the past

Gonna be enough to last

If tomorrow never comes

If you want to hear the real version of this song check it out here CLICK LINK on you tube then read on...  

"Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring."  Proverbs 27:1

That verse comes the closest to saying straight up "tomorrow is not promised". All of us have lost loved ones long before we thought it was their time. Fathers, mothers, husbands, wives,  brothers, sisters, friends or children, the list could go on. If we lost someone close do we really know how much they loved us? Do we say they loved us because it was something that we 'knew' even though they may not have said it or showed it very much? Were they one of those 'but you know how I feel about you' kind of people that did not show affection or say I love you? If that is the case it leaves a sad heart. 

This being written by a husband everything is written about a wife. But their are some wives that need a wake up call in the love and affection department and to show their husbands the respect, honor and love that the Bible commands.

We are not promised tomorrow and tomorrow may not come! That is a sobering thought that tonight when we lay our head down next to our wife, kiss her goodnight and close our eyes, we may not wake up to see her again. God may call us home. Or our wife may be called home. It is a real true possibility because no one knows the time that each of us has left on this earth. If that did happen, if I did not wake up tomorrow, would my wife know how much I loved her? Did I try in every way to show her every day that she's my only one? I have a marriage vow and a commitment and promise made before God and friends to honor, love, respect and protect her and there is no place for division in those vows! If we break them what else is left that is sacred. Like I say to my kids "A promise is a promise". In other words when you make a promise there is nothing greater and there is no excuse not to keep it, after all, a promise is a promise. I've been married for just over 7 years and while that seems like a short period of time, I hear people that are getting divorced say "We made it 10 years, we did good"? What? We have only 7 years in and we are just getting started!! In those 7 years you spend a lot of time around a wide variety of people and couples in a variety of places in their relationships. Some just married, some married 20 years, some engaged, some dating and some just starting to date etc. We notice little things about couples, it could be strangers or someone we are out with and we discuss these things... I'm sure you all do that. Some things blow me away the way some guys treat their wives (and vice versa).... and this is in public! Guys, the way you treat your kids and you wife around others will be multiplied when you are at home. Ever at a friends house and he 'tells' his wife to do something while he relaxes with the guys? "Hey 'wife' put the coffee on". " Hey  'wife'  the dishes need done".  'wife' the baby needs changed, 'wife' I want dinner on the table when I get home from work. The list could go on and on. Guys, your wife is your bride, your gift, the love of your life, your treasure as Solomon says,  the queen of your house, the mother of your children and the one you vowed to honor, respect and love with all of your heart!! If you even make a request or demand of your wife without the word please and end it with a question mark you don't deserve the woman that she is. Plain and simple you don't! You deserve the frying pan maybe but not that woman's love. Guys, our wives should be our top priority with only God above her. Someone once told me the priority list should be, "God, wife, kids" in that order. My thought was,  "He only says that because he does not have kids at home to deal with and prioritize", but later I realized how right he was. A kid centered home is a home with priorities out of order and you marriage will suffer. The stress builds up and you take it out on each other. Sarcasm sneaks in, finger pointing and blame. I was told by a husband that his wife would ask the same question all the time that he didn't have the answer to, his response was a sarcastic one that she knew wasn't serious. She would walk away and make her own decision on the matter and go on. After this went on for awhile he asked her "When I answer like that does it annoy you"? She answered "yes". He said "I thought you would have gotten the hint then". Come on man!! Is this really the relationship you want with your bride? With the limited time husbands spend with their wives on an average day, you are going to choose to use sarcasm instead of telling her how you really feel about her question? Communication is key.

"If I never wake up in the morning, would she ever doubt the way I feel about her in my heart?" 

There are two types of marriages and when I explain these two types our minds will race through all the ones we know and sort them out, and of course we see our own as the second type. But is it really? Deep down? The first type is what I call a business agreement marriage. The husband and wife both feel the same way about most of the main issues in life, they both want the same thing when it comes to kids and how they are raised, they have very similar wants and desires that they've talked about anyway. They 'get along' great and don't argue too much. She 'listens' to him and his final say. Most of the time they have no real issues to speak of..... but the marriage lacks,,,,, what's the word,,,,, lacks real substance, real passion, real love, real active pursuing self sacrificing daily affectionate passionate love. "But we have kids"..... bull crap! Kids only enhance it! Any couple that uses any excuse of why their marriage is anything less than type number two maybe shouldn't have gotten married.  It is a marriage that 'works' but is there actually anything else of value to it? Have you ever been around a married couple a lot and thought to yourself "I've never seen them touch each other, flirt, hug, kiss, laugh, snuggle........... and I've seen them a lot"? Where did the kids come from? ha. That's the first type!

The second type has a husband who makes his wife his first priority everyday. He never stops thinking about her and ways to make her happy, ways to honor and respect her. He tells her 5, no maybe 10 or 15 times a day that he loves her and makes sure she knows just how much! He demonstrates what love is to his kids and how to love a woman and their mother. He demonstrates by example that their is no place in our home for demands no matter who is talking or who is being talked to (except maybe in the bedroom) ha! They talk about things that upset them and work them out. He does everything he can to make her life and work easier. He is passionate about his wife and makes time for her. This second type of marriage prioritizes time together, daily, making it a priority to spend the last hour or two together to talk and enjoy each others company. Actively working things out so he can date his wife. Before you were married, you spent a lot of time together, you dated, you went to dinner, you spent time alone talking and playing games, you got her gifts and flowers... why did that all stop?? Don't say anything about your kids! Don't use them as an excuse of why you don't pursue your wife, why you aren't in love with her or why you don't passionately demonstrate your love and devotion to her everyday!  A husband once related to me how his wife never did this, always did that, beat him down, wore him out etc etc and he asked me how my wife and I get along so well. I told him I had a fail proof  plan for a great marriage. If everyday you both get up and think what you can do to make the others day better, never think of yourself, and in everything you do, do it for each other...... how can you go wrong? His response "Oh, well I could do that but she would never do it for me so it would never work". That, is a type 1 marriage that will probably never change. Husbands! you need to prioritize your wife, never stop thinking of her, never stop complimenting her and loving her no matter if she reciprocates it or not! It's all about how YOU treat her! 

If tomorrow never comes will she still be angry at the moron you were last night? Will she still be pissed because you yelled at her for not having dinner on when you got home?  Or will she remember how much you loved her without having to convince herself that you really did? Don't be one of those guys who tells your wife you love her once or twice a day. I don't care if you've been married for 45 years or just got married. Time should not matter when it comes to holding your bride, loving her, enjoying her, romancing her, thinking of her, kissing her and being her man, always thinking of ways to be of service to her! 

Every day, every minute you are around your bride treat her like tomorrow might not come, cause it might not! Make sure she knows what you think she knows. Treat her like the treasure that she is. Tell her again and again. Ask her if she knows. Tell her. Show her. Tell your children how much you love their mother and demonstrate it in their presence. Show them how to really love and respect a woman. If you have boys this is of monumental importance that you demonstrate how to respect and love a woman. Womanizers are not just something that 'happens'. If you know a man who disrespects women you have to wonder where his dad was during his growing years. When it comes to loving your bride tell her and show her so much that that smile and glow don't go away and when it does it lights back up again.

Acknowledge what your wife does. What she does for you, what she does for others and what she does for your family. Acknowledge and thank her when she does the dishes.......... "But that's her job, why would I thank her for doing what she is supposed to do?" You thank her because she IS doing the job that she is. Taking care of a house and family is no small task and a woman who chooses to do so deserves our thanks and appreciation. Even hear a guy joke around that 'the woman belongs in the kitchen'? He may make it out to be a joke, but I bet that if you were a fly on the wall you'd find out that he may only say it as a joke, but the attitude demonstrated in the daily grind says different. If tomorrow did not come would she suddenly feel free of your pressure to meet your standards when it comes to housework? Is she free to make her own rules and set her own schedule? Don't be a regret but instead be a joy to be around. Several wives have told me that if they could do it all over again they would never get married, they'd stay single their whole life. I questioned that maybe with the right person it would be different. They both had similar answers that no guy would be better than their current husband. How wrong they are but they will probably never know it! Don't be that husband that your wife despises. Be a breath of fresh air when you arrive home, not one of those "Here we go again" kind of husbands. Don't try to change her to be like you, it's not easy. Remember that the easiest thing for you to do, is be you. It's not easy for her to be you.  Thank her for everything she does, love her for who she is, date her, pursue her, treat her like your treasured bride that she is. That smile should not go away!

Tomorrow may not come. So each day. Live it with your wife in a way that if tomorrow does not come, with no words or convincing she will know in her heart and the world that witnessed your marriage will know the way you felt about her.

As a follow up note:

If all this sounds good but you find your spouse not responding to what you feel is the ultimate way to show love, maybe you just aren't speaking their language. More specifically, their Love Language. If that intrigues you, click this link and take the quiz http://www.5lovelanguages.com/